Friday 17 November 2017

100 WC week 10

   
                                     Bugs
 At that second I knew we were going to be in  in trouble.
"But where will we hide it all?!" My little sister screamed.
"Hide what?" My Mom asked from behind the door, in response I said,
"Nothing, nothing at all bye!" And with that I locked the door in one quick motion. I didn't notice that they had already slid under the door and were gone. I didn't know what to do, those little green slimy fart heads! Then I woke up...  

1 comment:

  1. I was not expecting your ending to your story. Remember you do not need to double up on end punctuation, just a question mark will do. You best line is "And with that I locked the door in one quick motion." It tells action and a response to what was said and is a well written sentence. I am wondering if more detail could be given to describe the green slimy fart heads, like what to they look like, why are they so bad, what will happen if they get out. This part is lacking detail.

    ReplyDelete

100 WC week# 27